Tag Archives: working out

Breathe it all out

Today I’m feeling a bit down in the dumps. As I’d previously mentioned here, I’ve gained a bit of weight since beginning my journey through recovery and finding out about intuitive eating. However, it’s been difficult for me to accept my body with this additional weight. Although I know some of it is healthy, I feel like I am bigger now than I’m happy with, and not in an exaggerated way. I am trying to love my body as it is, but I also think that I can be more mindful about what I need to eat and what will nourish me.

I’ve also been spending considerably less time at the gym because of the cold, but I think I’ve been kind of using that as an excuse. I’ve decided I really want to get back into running but strength training is really important to me too, so starting tomorrow I’m not giving myself excuses anymore. I love sweating and working out, and I am glad I took a bit of a break from hardcore workouts for about a week and a half, but I know it’s time for me to get back to doing what I know feels good for me and what will truly make me happy.

So on this Sunday, I’m going to breathe through this negativity I’ve been feeling and exhale it all out. I’m continuing to learn about my body and myself, and I know to feel my best I need to kick myself in the pants to get back to business. I’m not allowing myself to be lazy about my singing anymore, so I’m going to spread the motivation throughout my life and get moving! 🙂 Here’s to a great new start on Monday!!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Sniffles, please go away!

Today I was proud of myself for venturing out into the cold for a bomb.com workout at the gym and a quick stop at Whole Foods on my way home, gotta get this girl’s Peanut Butter stash all stocked up! And with plenty of yummy leftovers in the fridge, my wallet thanked me for not being tempted by my favorite thing ever- the hot food/salad bar. Seriously, getting takeout there is one of the best things.

I’m enjoying being cozy at home since it’s pretty chilly outside, although I think I’ve come down with a cold… Nothing some hot tea and a good night’s sleep can’t fix right?

What’s your favorite cold remedy? I remember when I was younger my mom would always make me hot vegetable or chicken broth in a mug accompanied by buttered toasts, and I would lay in bed reading or watching a movie. Ah that actually sounds like exactly what I plan to do this evening!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Gotta get my fix

Hello!

I hope your Thursday is treating you well. I felt really good about getting my booty in the gym this morning! Since my mini-commute to the gym is much longer in Boston than back home in Cali, I was kind of dreading having to deal with public transportation again just to get a workout in, but as soon as I stepped foot in the weight room, I remembered how worth it the extra time was. I love the feeling of exercising and making full use of my body and sweating and feeling air rush in and out of my lungs.

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Besides having class and rehearsal today, I got to Skype with my mom which is always a treat. Just seeing her face and hearing her voice is comforting. 🙂

Any other endorphin junkies like me out there? What’s your favorite way to sweat?

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

<a href=”http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/11602287/?claim=tnzzjyzq24a”>HERE</a&gt;

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Baji’s Breakfast and Family Time

Happy Saturday!

Yesterday I stayed off the blog because I was out enjoying one of my last days home. I started the day nice and early with brunch at Baji’s with my brother where we demolished stacks of delicious pancakes!

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Is there anything quite like pancakes to get through a tough leg day workout? I love working out with my brother because he’s always pushing himself to improve and get stronger than the day before. And he’s so supportive during challenging workouts! He keeps me honest and doesn’t let me get away with slacking. Lol 😉

We all managed to get some work done throughout the rest of the afternoon and topped off the day by finally seeing Catching Fire. Even though I hadn’t seen any movies all break, we’ve really put in some time at the movie theatre over the past couple days! CF was amazing, as I expected, and very true to the book which I SO appreciated. Can’t wait for the final installment!

Today I’m off to Carmel and Monterey with the family, and can’t wait to get a good look at the beautiful ocean. 🙂

What are you doing today? Do you live close enough to your family to spend the day together?

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Waking up in style

This morning was a total first for me- my brother woke me up to go to the gym- BEFORE I WAS UP! It may seem silly but I am always always up before him so I loved not having to be the one to drag his butt out of bed. 😉

We enjoyed a family brunch after working out this morning and then I got down to business with- you guessed it!- my PT studying. This anatomy and muscle ID-ing is really taking a toll on my sanity, but it’s also extremely interesting so I’m thankful I’m learning about it!

Here’s to freedom in 2.5 days- I hope I’ll be ready!!

What did you do on this sassy Saturday? 🙂

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Cook all the things

Today I’m happy about: having a wonderful dinner party with family and close friends at our house! It took a lot of planning and preparation on my Mom’s side, but I am happy I was able to help out in the end with some of the cooking. I was mostly caught up in studying for my exam all day, but I’m happy that I took a break tonight to help out and make this night a priority.

I also made a point of journaling earlier today when I was feeling conflicted about myself and my body, and it absolutely helped me see things a bit more clearly. I went to the gym afterwards and had a great plyometric-based workout that was exactly what I felt like doing, and I felt so accomplished and proud of myself for getting through a super tough circuit. 🙂

Now I’m going to sit down to a small bedtime snack and do a bit more studying before bed!

Happy Saturday!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Salut 2014!

Today I’m happy about: welcoming 2014 with a bang!

I started off my day with my favorite cinnamon oatmeal breakfast, and followed it by going for a run with my Mom. She is getting into running slowly but surely, and I was so excited that she wanted to go out for a short run with me, so I made sure we did it! Then I hit the gym with my favorite 3 training buddies for a brutal leg workout- where I squatted 205 pounds for 5 reps!! That is a HUGE PR for me and I couldn’t believe it even happened- thank god for my brother’s support, “You got this, that’s light weight!”

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Today I’ve spent about 5 hours studying, reading, and flash card-making for my personal trainer exam next week and the going may be slow, but at least it’s going!!

I had a beautiful and fun evening with family and friends at dinner last night, celebrating the new year beginning and I can’t wait to see and experience all the blessings that 2014 has to offer.

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What did you do to celebrate New Years Eve? Did you set any goals for 2014?

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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In the spirit of sharing

Today I’m happy about: being fortunate enough to celebrate Christmas Eve with my family! After a full-on feast for my brother’s bday yesterday, we’re taking a more relaxed approach to dinner tonight and getting a lot of our wrapping done this afternoon.

Now amidst all that I am grateful for, I’ going to get a little deep here. As I have been pretty honest about previously, I have struggled with disordered eating for many years and over the past 3 months I have made huge strides in recovering and getting in touch with my body by eating intuitively, as well as trying to exercise intuitively. Today I had a fantastic crossfit-inspired workout at the gym and felt so proud of myself and strong while there and even upon coming home. However, when I got back I did an “ab check” to see how my stomach was looking. Now, my body is not one that gets visible abs unless I’m severely underweight and at a body day percentage that would be incredibly detrimental to my overall health.

Over the past couple months that I’ve been trying to eat intuitively, I have gained some weight. Probably between 5-8 pounds and I know it was healthy weight to gain. However, now when I look in the mirror, I see the much larger girl I once was (I lost 35 pounds in my first year or college), and I feel horrible about myself. Despite the incredible strength I am building in the gym and my improved singing as I’ve begun to fuel my body more appropriately, I still feel that I am not enough. My body is not thin enough, or muscular enough, and I hate that I feel that way.

This is such a disordered way of thinking, and I am grateful that I can at least recognize it. Although I have been struggling with these feelings more recently, since I’ve been home and I am not able to control every little thing, I am also beginning to see the light in a different direction. If my body decides that weighing a few more pounds is where it feels best, then it will settle on a weight itself, without my overly obsessive control over it. By listening to my body and treating it with respect, it will naturally gravitate towards a happy and healthy weight that I can maintain with my lifestyle.

I’ve also been able to look at this obsession with weight through a different viewpoint, since my happiness has been so exponentially higher in the past few months. The truth is, weighing less will not truly make me happier. Fitting into a smaller pair of pants will not make me a nicer or more thoughtful person, and my friends won’t like me any more or less. I have spent too much time trying to achieve an aesthetic that is not maintainable, nor healthy, and I have sacrificed wonderful moments I could have enjoyed with family and friends, but chose to opt out of for fear of losing control and gaining 20 pounds in one evening (because that’s not ridiculous thinking right!?).

I choose to celebrate my life everyday and bask in the power my body has to perform difficult workouts, to hug my friends, to laugh hysterically with my brother, to sing at the top of my lungs, to run half marathons, to travel to foreign places, to practice yoga, to share my love and appreciation for life. I don’t want to be controlled by a disorder that has no place in my current life. It took over for many years, but I refuse to lose any more precious minutes giving in to the negativity.

I may not be where I want with my love of my body quite yet, but I know I am on the right path, and I am excited for the future and the continued freedom from the negativity, that I deserve.

I hope you all have a beautiful holiday, whether you celebrate Christmas or not, this is a time to be with the ones you love and to share traditions and be joyful.

Thank you so much to all you who stop by and take a few minutes to read this little blog. I am so happy to be able to share my story with you. Warmest wishes to you and yours!!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Why do I do it?

Today I’m happy about: enjoying yesterday night by going out to a Mexican restaurant for dinner with friends- complete with some of the best vodka cranberry’s I’ve ever had! We watched a performance on campus afterwards and I was blessed to have a hilarious ride home with a friend instead of braving the cold and bus situation.

And today I am particularly happy about going to the gym on campus even with the actually freezing temps outside. I really love and appreciate all the things my body can do, and exercise feels like such a great way to honor that and make the most of my health. However, today I felt a distinctly different connection to my workout than I do when I practice yoga.

Although both types of exercise get my body sweating, during yoga it’s all about me against myself and how I can hold onto a pose for just a few more cycles of breath, while today at the gym I noticed I was comparing myself to others and gauging my experience there, by what I perceived theirs to be. While it’s clearly easier for me to remain focused on myself when I practice at home, I recognized the different mindset I used at the gym and felt disappointed in myself for allowing my ego to tell me my own workout was not good enough.

So I dug down deep and thought about why I was working out. Why was I there despite the cold and long bus wait to get to the gym? And the truth was I was there for myself. Because I wanted to use my strong and healthy body to push myself through a challenging, heavy weights workout. I would be lying if I said it was that easy to stop thinking about everyone else there and just get back in my zone, but refocusing my thoughts definitely helped.

I workout for me. Not for people to comment on my body. Not to get more attention from boys. Not to be able to eat cake everyday. (Although that might creep in there occasionally…lol) but the reason I prioritize exercise on a daily basis is because it really makes me feel alive. And I LOVE that feeling. 🙂

Happy Sunday beautifuls!
I hope you do whatever you feel like today and move your body however it wants to be moved.

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Citations for days

Today I’m happy about: toughing it out and not giving up even though I could easily gotten overwhelmed by everything I needed to do. Instead I prioritized my health and sanity by having a great workout this morning (first day back at the gym now that it’s open after the holiday!), made myself a power bowl with quinoa for lunch and got down to business and hadn’t stopped working until 20 minutes ago. I am giving myself a huge high five for that!

Hope your Sunday was wonderful!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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