Tag Archives: opera

It’s been a while…

And a while, it certainly has.

My last entry here was almost 2 years ago, and my what a lot has changed. I kind of stumbled back onto this blog by chance as I was scrolling through my feed on BlogLovin and was happily surprised that I had not deleted it.

Some things are still the same, like my love for singing and performing, my devotion to working out, my struggle to be myself and own my journey, but I’m done with school and now working full time. That has proved to be a struggle in and of itself- I’m sure I’m not alone when I say that transitioning from being a student for over 16 years, to joining the workplace and becoming entirely financially independent, is no small feat! Now rather than forcing myself to workout in ways that make me unhappy, I’ve maintained a regular yoga practice for the past 8 months.Β It helps keep me centered and has really allowed me to embrace mindfulness and (try to!) come from a place of kindness when I am being hard on myself.

I’m still in Boston, and fortunate to be living with my best friend, but I’m beginning to wonder if this is the city I want to stay in. Yes, I have a stable job and living situation, but based on my less-than-stellar past audition season, am I really in the best location to maximize my opportunities to “make it”? And what even is “making it” to me anymore? I feel like there are so many questions rolling around in my head about whether I should stay or go or abandon this particular dream altogether! I love to perform, but do I love it enough to spend years on end occupying foreign hotel rooms by myself, flying to a new city every 6 weeks to perform a show and forge relationships with people I may never see again, over and over and over again? How important is my desire for a family? Do I want or expect a husband or children to follow me where I go?

 

These are just a few of the ramblings that have come loose from my brain in the past few months, and that I felt I needed to release ‘on paper’ so to speak. I think I’ll be frequenting this space a lot more, now that I’ve rediscovered it.

 

And as always, I’d love to hear your thoughts- be they on changing careers, making difficult decisions, or how to start your 401K. Yes, #adulting is now happening BIG TIME.

 

Love,

Happiness Starts Here

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Growing my own confidence

Thursday is finally here and it’s been a hectic week, but in the best way possible. I’ve been enjoying some really great coachings and have felt so great about my voice! I feel like I have earned this successful week and it’s giving me a bit more confidence in my singing. The end of the semester is approaching quickly and having my jury in a month is helping me stay focused and moving forward.

Luckily, I’ve also made time to catch up with an old high school classmate at lunch today and have enjoyed several coffee dates this week with a certain someone. Teaching has continued to feel easier and the lesson I taught tonight (my last for the week!) totally flew by! Hopefully that means I’m getting better… πŸ˜‰

Happy Thursday!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Spring has sprung!

Happy first day of Spring!

I enjoyed the day here as it hit about 52 degrees in Boston- score! I had a really lovely day; working out, attending class and a coaching, doing some work emailing for new students I’ll be taking on next week, and skyping with Mom. It’s always a pleasure to chat with her and we may have outdone ourselves, staying on for over an hour and forty-five minutes! I guess we had a lot to catch up on. πŸ™‚

Now I’m settling in for a night of relaxation with a big bowl of popcorn and some Netflix time. It’s been a pretty go-go-go week since I got back Sunday night so I’m thankful for a little respite before a fun weekend.

What do you do to unwind at the end of a long day?
I love curling up with a good book or reading some blogs, or zoning out to Netflix. And obviously a good snack or dessert has to happen too.

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Viewpoints

First days back are always challenging and today was no exception. It started off with a difficult voice lesson and although it was definitely needed, I came out of it feeling a little defeated. It might have to do with the jetlag or the insufficient sleep, but whatever it was, I’m hoping to wake up feeling more optimistic and ready to put in some hard work.

This afternoon, acting class focused on viewpoints and getting line athletically aware of our bodies and reacting to external and internal influences and impulses. I’m not new to this concept, but it was great to just move around and not take myself so seriously this afternoon. When you’re rolling around on the ground and your body is covered in dust and dirt, it’s hard NOT to let go a little bit.

Transitions are always tough, but seeing all my friends again today definitely lifted my spirits and much as I may be missing the Californian sunshine, I’m hoping Boston’s arctic freeze will thaw soon enough.

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Recapping a few days home

After a couple days off of the blog, I’m happy to report back that I am absolutely loving being home! Although I miss my brother, who is still in school because his spring break isn’t for a couple more weeks, I’m digging being an only child for a little while. πŸ˜‰

Yesterday, I had the privilege of singing a solo piece at both of my mom’s choral concerts. Our good family friends came to see us and it was really special to be able to share this concert and performance experience with my mom. The concerts took place at two retirement homes and I think the audiences really enjoyed the performance. It’s always very special to share music with people who so clearly appreciate it and I know from past experience that these older folks are some of the most appreciative.

On another note, since food is a pretty crucial (and super fun!) part of being home, we’ve eaten at a couple delicious restaurants, most notably Lyfe Kitchen where I devoured the best vegan burger I’ve had yet! Located in downtown Palo Alto, right off yuniversity Avenue, the atmosphere is casual but modern, and the service is incredibly quick. They have a wide selection of organic wine and beer, as well as 3 different menus based on your dining preferences and dietary concerns- Gluten free, Vegan/Vegetarian and Everything-tarian. There were so many things I wanted to try so I will definitely be back before this week ends.

Today started off with a rockin, butt-kicking boot camp at my gym! Holy cow I think I sweat out at least a gallon. And I loved every minute of it.

This afternoon mom and I took a trip downtown to hit up DSW for a new pair of audition shoes, and I totally lucked out finding these babies. They’re just the right height, super comfortable (for heels) and they’ll go nicely with all my audition garb. πŸ™‚

The best part of being home has really been spending time with my parents, and having some wonderful talks with my mom. They arise somewhat randomly but we always have great discussions about all sorts of things, which I love and treasure.

Happy Tuesday!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Opera scenes

Welcome to the weekend!

I’m looking forward to enjoying my first free Sunday in a while tomorrow, but today I had a great afternoon of performing an opera scenes program with my colleagues. Everyone worked really hard to prepare them over the past month and the work was obvious in everyone’s performance. I was so impressed with how talented our department is!

The only downside was I’ve been feeling a bit sick all day, but I’m hoping an early bedtime will cure whatever’s going around. Tomorrow we’re celebrating one of my friend’s 26th birthday so I definitely don’t want to miss the fun!

So this is going to be me in about 3 minutes…..

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Sleep never looked so good!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Game of Thrones!!

12 hours away from home and I was very happy to finally make it back tonight after a long day. Although it could have easily dragged on, I feel like I got so much done that it flew by!

I worked this morning, had several classes, worked on a group project, rehearsal, sat in on another teacher’s class this evening and finally went to support my friend auditioning for a competition. He did so well and all of us who were in the audience listened with our jaws dropped, so proud of his hard work.

And to end the day a little mindlessly, I’m watching a couple episodes of Game of Thrones…. Yes, I have officially become addicted and YES you should start watching it now. (It’s available on HBO on demand online!!) Daenerys Targeryan is my absolute favorite woman ever and I totally want to be her. Um… Halloween 2014 you just found your match. πŸ™‚

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from here

Do you watch Game of Thrones? If so, who’s your favorite character?
My friends have been telling me for over a year that I needed to start watching and I’m SO excited I finally did!!

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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Another one bites the dust

I get my life back today!

Oftentimes during a production, I feel nostalgic and a bit sad when it’s over, but despite the gorgeous music, I’m not sad to see it go. I’m working every day this week so I’m looking forward to at least having evenings off again to get some decent sleep again. πŸ™‚

After our last show, I grabbed drinks with a couple friends at our favorite margarita place to celebrate a successful run of the opera. Naturally we got to gossip and do all the things girls do.

Even though spring break is only a couple short weeks away, I already feel freer tonight and will happily continue enjoying my friends and of course margaritas until I get to fly home to the land of happy hour, gorgeous sunsets, and 70 degree weather.

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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All the questions and not a lot of answers

This week, I’ve been reading a book that’s definitely made its rounds in the world of disordered eating, and it’s not much of a surprise why. I’m talking about, “Living Without Ed” by Jenni Schaefer and Thom Rutledge. Ed is a way Jenni and her therapist devised to separate herself from her eating disorder. She began to treat her E.D. as the person, Ed, and shares her stories of recovery and her breakthroughs. Reading this has come at a really good time for me, since I’ve been needing a little extra support.

This week was a difficult one because I was more stressed than usual, and with all the uncertainty I’ve been facing regarding my life after graduation, I just could not for the life of me figure out how to calm down. So, I started looking at what I was eating, over-thinking the exercise I was doing, trying to control the things that in the past would have made me feel better. But in the midst of feeling a tiny bit of relief at being in control, I was also terrified that the issues I’ve tried so hard to get rid of, are coming back and are going to get the better of me.

I talked to my therapist on Wednesday about this and luckily she was able to help me see what was actually going on. It didn’t have to do so much with me hating the way I look and the fact that I don’t wear the same sized pants that I used to, but that I wasn’t in control of what my schedule was going to look like for the next few weeks, and that I am still not sure what to do after I graduate. I’ve been grasping at several different straws and each one seems like exactly the right one for a few days, and then I start to doubt whether it’s right or not. Then another idea comes along and that one now seems SO much better than anything else, so I feel like I finally know what I’m doing- but then my insecurity creeps right back in and says I’m probably wrong. Or that I’m taking the easy way out. Or that I’m unmotivated. Or that I need to try harder and be better. Or that I should just suck it up and keep doing what I’ve always done and stop questioning my future.

The thing is, as my therapist helped me see, it’s actually a good thing that I’m keeping such an open mind. It means I’m open to changes and to figuring out what is going to make me happy in the long run and I’m thinking about my real life priorities. Like having a family one day, and living in the same place for most of the year, and having a semi-regular day-to-day job where I can help people in some way. Music is what I’ve been doing FOR-EV-ER and IΒ do love it, but will it be enough for me at the end of the day when I’m 35, still single, and still totally in debt? Maybe I’m being too pessimistic and should look on the bright side more, but I just think I’m being realistic. How can I really know what the rest of my life will look like when I’m only 22? And how can I really know what I’ll want when I’m 35?

All I feel like I have right now is questions, and so few answers. I’m trying to remember that it’s ok not to have them though, and to just focus on what’s happening right now and giving myself completely to the present. As a semi control freak I guess that’s easier said than done! πŸ™‚

I hope you’re having a marvelous long weekend with Monday off tomorrow! I’m starting work early in the morning so unfortunately it’s only a 2-day weekend for me, but I’m going to enjoy my last couple hours before it ends anyways.

Love,

Happiness Starts Here

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Lovers Day

Happy Valentine’s Day!!

This is how I spent almost my entire day:

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I am incredibly thankful to be writing this as I’m on my way home from rehearsal about an hour earlier than I thought I would be! Yes, rehearsal until 10pm on a Friday night and Valentine’s Day no less, but that’s the life of an opera singer!

My first training session at work was bright and early this morning and it went really well too, so I’m excited to dive into this new project.

I hope you’re spending today with loved ones, I know mine are with me even if from afar. πŸ™‚

Love,
Happiness Starts Here

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