I hope your week is off to a great start! I got a ton of things done today, including checking off a presentation from my to-do list, some lunch with a nice guy :), a super zen psych appointment and my first Skype French lesson!
I’ve been psyching myself out a lot lately, or maybe I’ve just realized it and it’s been going on for a while. I have always taken my own self-confidence for granted because as a performer, I love being on stage and putting on a show, but that’s not really what everyday life is like. Every day is not a show and it would be SO exhausting if it was!
So this self-confidence I thought I had in the bag… Turns out, not so much. I’m not saying I can’t function, but when things go wrong or I start to worry about how the future will turn out, my first move is to doubt myself. Instead of looking at a task head-on and just accepting that most likely mistakes will be made and not everything will be rainbows and butterflies, I immediately turn inward against myself with thoughts that I should quit while I still can, or that I won’t succeed, or that someone will be better than me. And that’s just to name a few possibilities.
As I’m writing this all down, I’m thinking “What the heck?!” Why am I working so hard against myself sometimes, instead of doing what will make me ultimately feel more successful regardless of the outcome, which is to just believe in myself?? I feel like I’m fighting the stupidest battle because I’m actually creating more obstacles for myself!
No more. Now that I see what I’ve been doing, I’m not letting that get in my way anymore. Not in an obnoxious, self-centered way, but I have so much to offer as a performer, friend, daughter, person, so why would I hold myself back. The answer is I won’t.
Happiness Starts Here